I've now been to roundtable... I'm not even old enough to rent a car, and yet I've been to roundtable. To say the least, it was a slap-in-the-face welcome to the boring world of adulthood.For those of you who've grown up with parents involved in scouting, you may remember hearing them grumble under their breath about going to some horrendous meeting on a Thursday night. The second Thursday of the month, that is... always has been, always will be. Unless you end up in hell, then it'll be the second and fourth.
When I arrived at the meeting I saw a bigger crowd than I'd expected, all decked out in certified uniforms and neckerchiefs, mumbling to each other about the latest Klondike activity. There were basically three types of people in attendance:
1. The nice lady that serves faithfully as the troop's den mother. Always has a lot of fragile decorations in her house that you're not allowed to touch, but she's good for home-baked goodies.
2. The overly-cheerful guy that serves as the troop's scoutmaster. Dons a beard 90% of the time. Can rattle off at least 9 dutch-oven recipes upon request.
3. The newly-called scout leaders that are wondering what wrong they've done to the world to deserve such punishment.
After a few opening announcements, a bona fide scouter stood up and called a person from the congregation to join him on stage. Apparently the chosen individual had completed "Wood Badge," a week-long training course for scout leaders. With his wife in hand, the prizewinner took an honorable walk to the front; he looked proud as a peacock when a new neckerchief was placed upon his shoulders. The awarder then announced, "we can't let him go without singing the Antelope Song!" In a flash the others in the congregation, who'd apparently completed Wood Badge also, stormed the stage and belted out the type of song that makes you want to slam your head against the nearest solid surface. They finished, there was an awkward moment of silence, and the meeting resumed.I learned from roundtable that there is a pride cycle in the world of scouting. As an 11 or 12 year-old, it's neat to get badges and beads; when you're 17 or 18, it's not so great anymore. But when you become a middle-aged man, racking up badges suddenly becomes cool again.
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7 comments:
Ross, I laughed so hard at this post! I about died at the pictures--did you honestly get people to pose for this?! Hilarious!
Love the new blog, Rock! What's up with Ghengis Khan in the middle left of the first picture with all the scout people? That multi-colored beard/mustache thing is sweet!
Ross, once again you blow us away with your creative writing. You painted Scouts the way it really is.
Ugh.....scouts. What's your calling? I'm the 11 year old scout leader and I have ONE scout. It's awkward. Last week we talked about first aid for a scratches and bee stings. Scintillating. This week it's his physical fitness test. I just don't see him getting that one pull-up he's shooting for.
I knew when I saw the picture at the top that this post was going to be gold. I wasn't disappointed.
Scouting sucks big time. You heard it here first: Baden Powell was a sadist!
Nice Ross. Good Luck with the new calling. Remember there are ways out of this calling, but you'll have to register yourself and knock on the doors of you future neighbors. Think about it, it may be worth it to dodge the scouting bullet.
As a proud Tenderfoot, or Heart, or Life ... well something less than Eagle, let me tell you how much I enjoyed this post. Scouting truly does suck! Congrats on the calling my friend.
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